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Can you tell us your name, age and what dream you are living out?
My name is Chris Al-Aswad and I’m 29. I go by Lethe Bashar who is also the main character in my Novel of Life. My dream is to become a professional writer.
What are you working on at the moment?
Right now I’d like to finish the “Spain” section of the novel I’m writing, which is a novel that begins in multiple parts and follows those parts. There is not really a beginning or an ending but each part starts in a different place in the main character’s life.
When did you decide that it was possible to pursue your dream of writing?
I was always a really good student. In high school I was very studious, always focused on academics. When I got to college I was still focused on academics but I took a creative writing class. I had never really considered being a fiction writer before that class. It was an epiphany because I was always so academic minded. Fiction was another world I completely identified with.
When did you commit yourself to walking that path and what changed for you?
It was almost instantaneous. I had an epiphany one day after class; I felt like this was my calling. It was really like that, almost a hallucination and since that moment I was determined.
Do you remember any shifts in your mind-set in that moment?
It felt like I had a purpose. Before I was kind of doing what my father wanted me to do which was to be a good student and to study subjects like history and English, write papers, and learn a language. However, once I had that experience with creative writing I saw myself as a creative artist. My mom had always been an artist so to me that was like finding myself, discovering who I really am.
Do you remember any mental or physical barriers that you initially had to overcome?
I was entering a drug addiction at the same time and so the barriers were the confusion that was involved in terms of identity. I was always an overachiever and I started to take Ritalin in college. And Ritalin was a way for me to study and also get high at the same time. My barrier was that I felt inadequate and I took drugs in order to be superhuman. A lot of these drugs are mental enhancements so they enhance your mind. I was really into that.
Let me be clear about my drug addiction because I think that is really important to this story. I may have first realized that I could be a writer before I started to get heavily into drugs but my dream is what really got me clean. After I got clean, many years later, I only had my dream. It had been so confused for so many years that once I got clean, my purpose in life became crystal clear. I could follow that path directly then. It was really the only thing I had. It was either follow my dream and write or go back to drugs; all I had was my dream.
I want to make that clear because when you are talking about your dream it is a very positive thing but life is not black and white and sometimes our dreams are confused for dark fantasies when we are younger. There is a dark side to life. You need to grow up to turn your dreams into reality. I don’t believe that you can be truly successful until you are manifesting your dream in a healthy way. I don’t think people on drugs are living a dream; I consider that living a nightmare. Dreams get distorted when you are using drugs
Can you tell me what are your strengths and weaknesses?
I’m going to start speaking from the present now because I’ve been talking a lot about the past. From the present then I have a very addictive personality still. With my work one of my greatest weaknesses is I have a hard time putting it down. It’s hard for me to get out of that space of creating; I always want to be there. Sometimes you need time apart from it. I have to stand back from what I’m doing and let go; not letting go is my greatest weakness.
I feel like I am always trying to look at things in a very inventive way. That is one of my greatest strengths. With my writing I’m not satisfied with sending my manuscripts and poems off to publishers and small presses and harvesting rejection letters. I love the new way which is self-publishing on the Internet. I love the unknown. The unknown for me is my greatest strength which also is the greatest freedom; the freedom to do things in a way that haven’t been done before.
How has doing what you are doing changed how you see future possibilities and also challenges?
One of my challenges is increasing my readership. I have two basic goals as a writer: I want to be the best writer I can be and I want more readers so I can reach more people with my stories. That is one of my challenges, you know there are people out there but it is hard to reach them. The difference in how I look at it now versus before is that now I feel I am already published. I remember a professor who used to tell me that I wouldn’t get published for another 7-10 years on top of other really discouraging stuff. He was a real jerk. Before I always looked at things with cynical eyes, like life is a zero-sum game.
Now I see that this is not true. I am published now. People are reading my stuff. I have had so many surprises along the way: people who have not only read my work but reviewed it, and people who have not only reviewed it but revised it! If my old professor could only know what the general public has done for me within that mark of time he gave me, he’d be really surprised. He didn’t know the future. He didn’t know that the Internet would become so popular, that writers would become self-publishers. I think that is the important thing to understand about possibility; you don’t know anything about it. You don’t know what is going to happen. The possibilities are whatever you define for yourself.
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How has your perspective on life changed?
I look at things very creatively. I read a lot; I read The New York Times cover to cover every day. Everything for me is a collage. I take things and I put them into my notebook. I cut out pictures and comics and words. My experiences are fodder for creating my existence. That is the whole purpose behind my Novel of Life, life as art. That is the goal and that is how I see my role as a novelist, to be different from traditional novelists who write novels that are separate from themselves. Of course their lives are always reflected in those novels, but I feel that I am taking my life chapter by chapter, investigating and opening it up.
What is your next dream?
I would really like to publish the Novel of Life in print; I think that is the most realistic dream. My next big dream is the fruition of the novel: growing an audience and growing as a body of work as well.
What kind of feedback or advice were you given and how did you perceive it?
I told you about my professor who was very discouraging. I have a mentor at University of Chicago. Her name is Alane Rollings, she is a famous poet and I’m very lucky to know her. She has mentored me throughout the last 10 years of my life as a writer. Her husband is Richard Stern, a very famous novelist. They are veteran literary figures, well recognized. That gives me a lot of faith in myself because they are supporting what I do. She has been my spiritual mother. She has read every poem I’ve sent her, she has written lengthy critiques on my novels. That kind of support is very rare; I’ve been lucky.
How do you perceive society?
That is a hard question. It’s so huge. I’m pretty sheltered now even though I’ve experienced a lot during my addiction when I was all over the country and the world. Since I’ve gotten clean I’ve retreated into a safe-zone. I’m not drinking alcohol, I’m not using drugs and I don’t want to jeopardize my life anymore. My vision of society is different than it was before.
It’s hard to make a singular statement about it because things are changing so much these days, especially now, there is nothing static about the world. It seems very tumultuous, I feel like we are living in a very tumultuous period and world, in terms of physical disasters and economically as well. We are living very tenuous lives. I don’t believe there is anything stable or solid about the world we live in. This could be very liberating in a sense because there are no hard and fast rules for our society anymore; but then it could also be very dangerous, obviously because you never know what is going to happen next.
All you can say about society right now is that it is in flux. It is the essence of fluctuation. It is all based on how we respond to that sort of flux.
What is most important to you in life?
I have to say relationships; they are more important than my writing. Of course my writing is a relationship to myself and to my audience but because that hasn’t fully formed yet, my relationship to my audience is in a pre-mature state. I don’t really have a huge audience yet. My relationships to those around me are most important: my girlfriend, my father who is really important to me, my sisters, my aunts and uncles.
What is the best advice you can give to others who also want to live out a dream that is important to them?
As much as it seems like you are doing it for others, you really are doing it for yourself. I believe that the most important thing about creativity and art is to be interested in what you are doing. No one is going to be interested in what you do unless you are. To be passionate and interested about what you are doing in this very moment and be passionate about where the next step is leading. That is the greatest suggestion I can give because the interest, love and passion that you bring to your work is exactly what your audience is going to get out of it.
What are you most proud of in your life?
I was very proud of myself when I graduated college. I had been on drugs for so long that to stop drugs and get my degree was a proud moment. I graduated with honors in English. My professors really thought that I was bound for graduate school. I am so determined in life that grad school seemed to be my natural progression. However, I wasn’t going to live my life for someone else or live someone else’s dream. I wanted to take that energy and enthusiasm that I had in school and live my own destiny. Probably my greatest accomplishment was graduating, getting my degree and then making the decision to do what I wanted to do.
To learn more about Chris and read his “Novel of Life” go to:
Great interview.His authenticity, honesty and courage shine
through , of course coming from an (unbiased) reader.
Thanks Dad . . . lol
Hello Chris,
Great interview. Your honesty about your drug use is admirable. I’m so glad to know that you have overcome it and now living clean and living your dream. I wish, too, that your readership will increase because your novels are very well worth reading. Great pix you have there, by the way. Keep writing. One day your novel will be in print, and I’ll say i know you back when. …Hehe.
Tasha
Thanks Tasha
Chris,
Profound interview with something to teach all of us. You are already so successful in your life; not only in your writing but in the evolvement of your beautiful self. I am so enriched by being part of your life, and even though I am much older than you, I have learned so much from you. We have been a good team in our writing endeavors, and I look forward to our ongoing enlightened relationship! Gretta
That was a really great interview. I may be a wee bit biased, but I think your story is a real inspiration to people to follow their dreams. There are so many people out there who are afraid to do what they love and be who they are. They should learn from you!
Chris this interview is a true delight to read! You are an inspiration to me and these honest words you have shared about your past, your present and your future plans remind me that I have choices too. Keep giving of yourself as these are the real gifts that we all need.
With love – Michelle
super rad interview man.
This interview captures the insight, energy, and creativity that I fell in love with.
Hi Chris! Was great to read your story. Best of luck with the novel, I’m going to check it out. I’m moving back to Chicago soon, so perhaps ‘ll see you around.
Best,
Christy Parker
Wow Christy,
Good to hear from you . . . it’s been a long, long time . . . Hopefully we can reconnect in person. We need to have some sort of reunion.
Chris